Eric Whitacre

The Text

1. The Boy Who Laughed At Santa Claus

In Baltimore there lived a boy,
He wasn’t anybody’s joy.
Although his name was Jabez Dawes,
His character was full of flaws.

In school he never led his classes,
He hid old ladies’ reading glasses,
His mouth was open when he chewed,
And elbows to the table glued.
He stole the milk of hungry kittens,
And walked through doors marked NO ADMITTANCE.
He said he acted thus because
There wasn’t any Santa Claus.

There isn’t any Santa Claus!

Another trick that tickled Jabez
Was crying BOO at little babies.
He brushed his teeth, they said in town,
Sideways instead of up and down.
Yet people pardoned every sin,
And viewed his antics with a grin,
Till they were told by Jabez Dawes,
“There isn’t any Santa Claus!”

Like whooping cough, from child to child,
He sped to spread the rumor wild:
“Sure as my name is Jabez Dawes
There isn’t any Santa Claus!”
Slunk like a weasel or a marten
Through nursery and kindergarten,
Whispering low to ev’ry tot,
“There isn’t any, no there’s not!”

“There isn’t any, there is no Santa Claus.”
He said, “There isn’t any, not there’s not! There isn’t any Santa!”
Poor Jabez Dawes, poor Jabez Dawes
Said it because he’s full of flaws.
Poor Jabez Dawes, he said that there wouldn’t, couldn’t ever be a Santa.

Poor Jabez Dawes, boy full of flaws,
Broke all the laws ‘bout Santa Claus.
Poor Jabez Dawes acted because
there would not, could not be a Santa Claus!

2. The children wept all Christmas Eve

The children wept all Christmas Eve
And Jabez chortled up his sleeve.
No infant dared hang up his stocking
For fear of Jabez’ ribald mocking.
He sprawled on his untidy bed,
Fresh malice dancing in his head,
When presently with scalp a-tingling,
Jabez heard a distant jingling;
He heard the crunch of sleigh and hoof
Crisply alighting on the roof.

What good to rise and bar the door?
A shower of soot was on the floor.
What was beheld by Jabez Dawes?
The fireplace full of Santa Claus!

3. Then Jabez fell upon his knees

Then Jabez fell upon his knees
With cries of “Don’t,” and “Pretty please.”
He howled, “I don’t know where you read it,
But anyhow, I never said it!”

“Jabez,” replied the angry saint,
“It isn’t I, it’s you that ain’t.
Although there is a Santa Claus,
There isn’t, wasn’t, couldn’t ever be a Jabez Dawes!”

Said Jabez then with impudent vim,
“Oh, yes there is; and I am him!
Your magic don’t scare me, it doesn’t”—
And suddenly he found he wasn’t!

From grimy feet to grimy locks,
Jabez became a Jack-in-the-box,
An ugly toy with springs unsprung,
Forever sticking out his tongue.

The neighbors heard his mournful squeal;
They searched for him, but not with zeal.
No trace was found of Jabez Dawes,
Which led to thunderous applause,
And people drank a loving cup
And went and hung their stockings up.

All you who sneer at Santa Claus,
Beware the fate of Jabez Dawes,
The saucy boy who mocked the saint.
Donner and Blitzen licked off his paint.

Ogden Nash, 1902 – 1971

The Text

1. The Boy Who Laughed At Santa Claus

In Baltimore there lived a boy,
He wasn’t anybody’s joy.
Although his name was Jabez Dawes,
His character was full of flaws.

In school he never led his classes,
He hid old ladies’ reading glasses,
His mouth was open when he chewed,
And elbows to the table glued.
He stole the milk of hungry kittens,
And walked through doors marked NO ADMITTANCE.
He said he acted thus because
There wasn’t any Santa Claus.

There isn’t any Santa Claus!

Another trick that tickled Jabez
Was crying BOO at little babies.
He brushed his teeth, they said in town,
Sideways instead of up and down.
Yet people pardoned every sin,
And viewed his antics with a grin,
Till they were told by Jabez Dawes,
“There isn’t any Santa Claus!”

Like whooping cough, from child to child,
He sped to spread the rumor wild:
“Sure as my name is Jabez Dawes
There isn’t any Santa Claus!”
Slunk like a weasel or a marten
Through nursery and kindergarten,
Whispering low to ev’ry tot,
“There isn’t any, no there’s not!”

“There isn’t any, there is no Santa Claus.”
He said, “There isn’t any, not there’s not! There isn’t any Santa!”
Poor Jabez Dawes, poor Jabez Dawes
Said it because he’s full of flaws.
Poor Jabez Dawes, he said that there wouldn’t, couldn’t ever be a Santa.

Poor Jabez Dawes, boy full of flaws,
Broke all the laws ‘bout Santa Claus.
Poor Jabez Dawes acted because
there would not, could not be a Santa Claus!

2. The children wept all Christmas Eve

The children wept all Christmas Eve
And Jabez chortled up his sleeve.
No infant dared hang up his stocking
For fear of Jabez’ ribald mocking.
He sprawled on his untidy bed,
Fresh malice dancing in his head,
When presently with scalp a-tingling,
Jabez heard a distant jingling;
He heard the crunch of sleigh and hoof
Crisply alighting on the roof.

What good to rise and bar the door?
A shower of soot was on the floor.
What was beheld by Jabez Dawes?
The fireplace full of Santa Claus!

3. Then Jabez fell upon his knees

Then Jabez fell upon his knees
With cries of “Don’t,” and “Pretty please.”
He howled, “I don’t know where you read it,
But anyhow, I never said it!”

“Jabez,” replied the angry saint,
“It isn’t I, it’s you that ain’t.
Although there is a Santa Claus,
There isn’t, wasn’t, couldn’t ever be a Jabez Dawes!”

Said Jabez then with impudent vim,
“Oh, yes there is; and I am him!
Your magic don’t scare me, it doesn’t”—
And suddenly he found he wasn’t!

From grimy feet to grimy locks,
Jabez became a Jack-in-the-box,
An ugly toy with springs unsprung,
Forever sticking out his tongue.

The neighbors heard his mournful squeal;
They searched for him, but not with zeal.
No trace was found of Jabez Dawes,
Which led to thunderous applause,
And people drank a loving cup
And went and hung their stockings up.

All you who sneer at Santa Claus,
Beware the fate of Jabez Dawes,
The saucy boy who mocked the saint.
Donner and Blitzen licked off his paint.

Ogden Nash, 1902 – 1971

Instrumentation

Flute
Oboe
Clarinets in B-Flat / Bass Clarinet
Bassoon
Horn in F
Trumpet in B-Flat
Trombone
Percussion
Glockenspiel
Chimes
Vibraphone
Marimba
Triangle
Sleigh Bells
Suspended Cymbal
Piatti
Snare Drum
Bass Drum
Harp
Piano
Treble Chorus
Mixed Chorus
Violin 1
Violin 2
Viola
Violoncello
Contrabass